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Self Esteem
Most people measure their self esteem through externals:
Did I get a good
appraisal?
Did I get the raise I asked for?
Do my colleagues think I'm a team player?
Did I get praised by my manager?
These criteria for assessing our self-worth aren't wrong: of course we need the acknowledgement of others to confirm
and bolster our sense of self.
However, if our self-esteem is based solely on these externals, we continually rely
on others to make us feel good and we need ever-increasing doses of approbation from others to keep us going.
Without
a firm foundation of your own view of self worth, then your self-esteem can be knocked back quite quickly and easily.
There
will be a tendency to blame externals when your esteem is knocked and to play the game of "if only" ("If only such and such
would happen or hadn't happened then I'd feel better and things would be OK.").
Good self esteem comes from knowing
what qualities and skills you have that you can rely on.
It comes from having realistic and achievable goals and knowing
you can reach them, rather than trying to be perfect and do everything.
And it comes from knowing where you shine
and putting yourself in those situations as often as possible.
We can't really point you in any one direction, since
gaining and developing self-esteem underlies all our work.
Thanks for dropping by and taking a look at my photos.
Enjoy the website, please feel free to contact me.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder unless he be willing to climb
himself. -Andrew Carnegie
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